Tuesday, March 26, 2013

Treat Yo Self: Blender Edition

I've had a taste of consumery kewl-aid and treated myself to a kick-ass blender! Because as math will tell you:

belated anniversary gift + pre-emptive Mother's Day gift = $600 blender

That's just science, friends.

Yep, a Vitamix, even! I ordered it online from Aviva in Winnipeg on Friday afternoon and it arrived today. A friendly tip o' the hat to Nathan, who runs Aviva, by the way, for: a) answering the phone himself; b) being an extremely knowledgeable and an all-around friendly person to chat with.

Git outta the box!
Out o' the box, the Vitamix "Professional Series 300" (because I'm seri-ous about mah chow) comes with a "welcome package" (heh heh), a big ole recipe book, and a big dang dong (another "welcome package"? meh heh hehhh) to push stuff around in the blender without losing a hand like Buster Bluth.

(Please excuse the messy kitchen, the electrician working in the corner, and my beagle, patiently waiting for something even vaguely food-like to fall. No time for photo love, Doctor Jones, I've got some shit to cream to smithereens.)

Hard-as-nuts frozen froo-its! Green tea!
I'm not the most organiziest person around. HUMBLE BRAAAAAG, because yes I aaaam! I mean, I *knew* the blender was coming today, but did I have the perfect blend of froo-its and other Wholesome Goodnesses on hand to cream to crap? Heck yes. And not even by design, suckas!

We went deep freeze, bros, and found some stone cold blackened bananas in the freezer (which I was of course saving for just such an occasion because that is what ladies do). And I did have some o' that PC Organics Power Fruit Blend on hand in the freezer, too. Less because I am an Organic Lady and more because That Shit is Awesome-Tasting. I brewed some green tea quicksmart and dumped the slightly-unappetizing-looking combo into the blender. In maybe 30 seconds...? I had an Elixir of the Gods. Smooth, creamy, nary a poopy lump of banana to be found.

Haiku Ode to a Smoothie

Sweet bliss. SO yummy.
Hit that shit with mint next time.
And maybe vodka.

I've been using the same immersion blender (since my 13-year-old was born) to do this kind of shit and it STINKS (Sorry, Braun old buddy, but you do. You STINK), and I bid it a hearty adieu. The Vitamix blender is loud, sure, but it didn't seem as bad as errybuddy seems to complain it is! And also? Smoothies from the retail place that will cream these drinks for you cost almost $7 a pop! Ergo, in 100 smoothies, The Vitamix Hath Paid for Itself.

This is only day 1, of course, but I have a feeling this is the start of a bee-you-tee-ful friendship. Summer is coming, y'all, and I got me a serious hankerin' for blended icy cocktails! Margaritas? Sangria smoothies? Heck yeah.